Wednesday, 27 November 2013

The Aliens Came to Earth, Just Once

It’s not widely known, but in 2011 an alien ambassador visited Earth to meet with 20 of our world leaders.

After introductions were made, the ambassador’s first question was to ask how many of those present were psychologists. The answer came as a surprise.

“Really?” said the ambassador. “None of you? Let me check if I’ve translated the word correctly. Is psychology not the study of human behaviour, of how humans function; how to identify and understand their needs, their shortcomings, what inspires them or demoralises them, what they dream of?”

“Ah,” said the leaders. “We see the mistake here. We have indeed studied those things, but we have different names for them.”

“Forgive me,” said the ambassador. “My translator has now updated me. So then, which of you are artists, poets, sociologists, educators, writers?”

“No, no,” said the leaders. “Those aren’t the right names either. Here, let us explain.”

Each then proudly told of his or her academic qualifications while the small translating device whispered in the ambassador’s ear. The meeting continued a little while longer, then the ambassador thanked the leaders for their hospitality and returned home.

There has been no further contact from the aliens since that day.

Academic Qualifications of World Leaders in 2011:

SARKOZY (France) - Masters degree in Private Law
OBAMA (USA) - Degree in Political Science, degree in Law
MERKEL (GERMANY) - Masters degree in Physics
CAMERON (UK) - Degree in PPE (Philosophy, Politics & Economics)
HARPER (Canada) - Masters degree in Economics
ZUMA (South Africa) - No formal qualifications
FELIPE CALDERON (Mexico) - Masters degree in Economics
FERNANDEZ DE KIRCHNER (Argentina) - Degree in Law
ROUSEFF (Brazil) - Degree in Law
HU JINTAO (China) - Degree in Engineering
NAOTO KAN (Japan) - Degree in Law
MANMOHAN SINGH (India) - Masters degree in Economics
SUSILO BAMBANG YUDHOYONO (Indonesia) - Military qualifications
MEDVEDEV (Russia) - Degree in law
RECEPP TAYYIP ERDOGAN (Turkey) - Degree in Business Administration
VAN ROMPUY (EU President) - Degree in Philosophy, Masters degree in Economics
BERLOSCONI (Italy) - Degree in Law
GILLARD (Australia) - Degree in Law
KING ADBULLAH (Saudi Arabia) - No formal qualifications
LEE MYUNG-BAK (S Korea) - No formal qualifications

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